Antioch Covenant Church

Unleashing Hope: Play Great Defense

Ephesians 6:10-11

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.” Vs. 10

Rope-A-Dope

When I say the names Muhammad Ali and George Foreman what do most people think of today? An older man with Parkinson’s disease and a guy who sells grills.

But there is a great story that goes with these two men.

Mohammad Ali was born Cassius Clay an won the light heavy weight title in the 1960 Olympics. He turned pro and at age 22 won the heavy boxing championship title in a stunning victory over Sonny Liston. Shortly after that he converted to Islam and changed hi name to Mohammad Ali.

He was quite a character; very cocky, talkative but likable in many ways. In 1967-68 he protested against war and against the draft and was eventually arrested and imprisoned for 3 ½ years. When he got out of jail he attempted to regain his heavy weight title. His fought a couple of guys but hadn’t gotten enough of a chance to win back the title. Ali wanted to fight Joe Frazier for the title but in a stunning upset George Foreman beat Frazier. So the stage is set for Ali to fight Foreman.

I was 13 at the time and I remember this really well. In Kinshasa, Zaire in 1974 that had the name Rumble in the Jungle. The fight was suppose to be earlier in the year but Foreman got a cut above his eye in training and the fight was postponed a short time. Finally the time had come for the fight. Ali was famed for his speed and technical skills, while Foreman’s raw power was his greatest strength. Ali began by attacking Foreman with disorienting ‘right-hand leads’ really hoping to attack that eye that had been cut.

Ali had told his trainer, Angelo Dundee, and his fans that he had a secret plan for Foreman. As the second round commenced, Ali frequently began to lean on the ropes and cover up, letting Foreman punch him on the arms and body (a strategy Ali later dubbed the rope-a-dope). Ali would bait him with a punch or two and then move into the rope-a-dope. As a result, Foreman spent his energy throwing punches that either did not hit Ali or were deflected in a way that made it difficult for Foreman to hit Ali’s head, while sapping Foreman’s strength due to the large number of punches he threw. This loss of energy was key to Ali’s “rope-a-dope” tactic.

Meanwhile, Ali took every opportunity to shoot straight punches to Foreman’s face (which was soon visibly puffy). When the two fighters were locked in clinches, Ali consistently out-wrestled Foreman, using tactics such as leaning on Foreman to make Foreman support Ali’s weight, and holding down Foreman’s head by pushing on his neck. He constantly taunted Foreman in these clinches, telling him to throw more punches, and an enraged Foreman responded by doing just that.

After several rounds of this, Foreman began to tire. His face became increasingly damaged by hard, fast jabs and crosses by Ali. The effects were visible as Foreman was staggered by an Ali combination at the start of the fourth round, and again several times near the end of the fifth.

Ali won by knockout, putting Foreman down just before the end of the eighth round. It has been called “arguably the greatest sporting event of the 20th century”.

Ali did something that won him back the heavyweight title, he played great defense from the very beginning.

This was one of the greatest defensive moves of all time. In most sports there is a saying that goes something like this; Defense wins championships. What about us in life? Have you ever thought about what it looks like to play great defense in your life and our battle against Satan and sin? Well, today we are going to look at just that. If you are able, please stand as we read God’s Word from Ephesians 6:10-11.

Read Passage – Ephesians 6:10-11

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.”

We’re In A Battle

It may not seem like it at times but the reality is that we are in a battle. Not a physical battle but a spiritual one. This is a battle that if you’re not prepared to fight in, you can lose a lot really fast. Verse 11 mentions that when it says:

“Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.” vs. 11

Paul calls us to put on armor. Armor is something your wear to protect you and keep you alive. We need to protect ourselves. Why? Because we are defending ourselves against the schemes of the devil. We’ve been on a journey of discovering how to unleash hope in our lives. As we go through this holiday season and move toward a new year, we need hope more than ever because we are in a battle and there are things that want to kill our hope.

Hope Killers

In your outline there are listed 5 things that the devil uses to battle us and kill our hope. They are:

• Bitterness Bitterness is being resentful, cynical.
• Worry Worry is to torment with cares, anxieties, trouble and plague
• Looking Back When you look back you are unable to see what is ahead

• Guilt Guilt is a feeling of responsibility or remorse for some offense, crime, wrong, etc., whether real or imagined.

• Past Failures Past failures are hard to get past. They are the things that put those negative voices in your head and stop you from moving ahead.

The thing all of these thing have in common is that they will kill your hope and when you have no hope, you don’t want to go on. Going back to what Paul said in Ephesians, these are the weapons Satan uses.

Note: When you know what weapon will be used against you, you can prepare to protect yourself against it.

Play Defense With These Life Strategies

So the best way to attack the schemes of the devil is to play great defense. You might even put it this way: What is my rope-a-dope?

Ill. One of the things Ali did while using the rope-a-dope was watch every moved Foreman made so that when the time came, he knew his strategy and how to best attack him because Ali would know th moves Foreman would make.

Here are three defensive things we can build into our life’s strategy to do that.

1. Never Make Decisions When You’re Down

First, never make decisions when you’re down. This is an important strategy because when you are down, you are sad, depressed, and you feel like a loser or unworthy. Your outlook is compromised. When you are in that place, you tend to make bad choices. Our emotions get the best of us. An example of this is when we get angry and we act and react to things is foolish ways. Proverbs 14:7 says:

“A quick-tempered person does foolish things, and the one who devises evil schemes is hated.” Prov. 14:7

Ever make a decision when your emotions got the best of you and then look back with regret?

Ex. The time in high school when I got mad and went storming off and took off out of the church parking lot in my car. Somebody tried to stop me. I got more mad and threw the car in reverse and without looking back up…right into the guy behind me leaving church too? Ouch!

Here’s a fact: you will be down at times. You will have things go wrong, you will get depressed at times and you will get emotional. But here is another fact: things change. When we make decisions when we are down or emotional, you make knee-jerk reactions that are almost always bad. You very rarely here about a knee-jerk decision that ends up good. See here is the point: When you make knee jerk decisions and they are bad, they put you headed down the wrong path, in the wrong direction. And when you’re headed in the wrong direction, you end up at the wrong destination.

2. Respond To Bad News In Great Ways

The second strategy is to respond to bad news in great ways. I wish I could tell you that you can get through life without bad news. It’s just not true. Most of the time you have no control over that. You have the decision of what to do and how to react to bad news. Matthew 5:45 says:

“He (God) causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” Matt. 5:45

Life has difficulties. The bad times come on all people. I know at times it seems like some people have a lot less bad times than others. Keep in mind that a lot of times it’s nt that they don’t have difficulties, it’s just that you don’t always know what they are going through. We have become good at hiding our struggles and difficulties from others. We say things like “I’m good” when we are struggling and hurting inside. We need people to confide in and people that we can trust and will walk with us through our tough times.

Ex. It’s okay to be down and to struggle but how do you respond after that? Let’s look at a man who did jus that, Nehemiah. He was down. He cried. He felt the pain of his people and that their city and land had been ravished. But he responds by praying and asking God to show him his next moves. He’s down but not for long.

He bounces back and responds with God’s plan so that others can see that so that God is glorified in what he does.. Jesus told us in Matt. 5:16:

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matt. 5:16

We respond in great ways when we follow God’s plan and God’s ways and trust him. When we do that, it gives us hope for the future.

3. Shake It Off and Step Up

And third, We need to shake off the struggles and difficulties and strep up.

Ill. Let me us an old parable to illustrate this. There was this old farmer who had a old mule that fell into a dry abandon well on his property. The farmer decided that neither the mule or the well with worth saving, so he enlisted his neighbors to help haul dirt to bury the old mule in the well and put him out of his misery. The old mule brayed hysterically as the first shovels of dirt rained down on him. But as he struggled , a thought struck the mule: “Every time a shovel of dirt lands on my back, I’ll just shake it off and step on it.” So that’s what he did. Shovelful after shovelful, the old mule fought panic and just kept right on shaking and stepping. Shake it off and step up! Shake it off and step up! Before long, the battered old and exhausted old mule stepped triumphantly out of the well and onto solid ground.

If we let things like bitterness, worry, guilt and failures get the best of us, we have let the devil win and our hope is gone. To unleash hope, we look to what God has for us and shake off those difficulties and step up into new things. God can take any situation and use it for good. Remember the story of Joseph, a guy sold into slavery by his brothers, slavery! He is accused of rape, he gets forgotten in prison for years, I mean, this guy had every set back in the book. Listen to his response to his brothers when he faces them again in Genesis 50:20:

 ^“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good…” Genesis 50:20

The catch to living this life is to turn to God and allow Hime to define who you are and what is happening to you. Phil. 2:14

“…for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.” Phil 2:14

Be Strong In The Lord

So Paul writes in Ephesians 6:10:

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.” vs. 10

The key to unleashing hope is to not trust in your own strength but to trust in the strength of God. God’s got all the strength you need.

Give them this exercise for the week:

Here are the hope killers we talked about and a verse to go along with it. Look up the verse and discover what hope builder is in that verse and write it in the blank space.

Discovering Hope Builders

Killer                Verse                Builder

• B__________ Philippians 4:13 ____________
• W_________ 1 Peter 5:7 ____________
• L__________ Psalm 141:8 ____________
• G__________ Romans 8:1 ____________
• P__________ Romans 8:37 ____________

Unleashing Hope: Replace Burnout With Balance

Matthew 11:28-30

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” vs. 28

Leading Causes

Ask congregation to turn to their neighbor and briefly identify the top 2 or three causes of stress and burnout and write them on your outline.

Statisticbrain.com reports that in 2013, the following were the leading causes of stress in the U.S. (Show in reverse order going from #7 to #1)

• Job Pressure
• Money
• Health
• Relationships
• Poor Nutrition
• Media Overload
• Sleep Deprivation

You might be thinking, “Ron, look around. It’s Christmas. This is supposed to be when you talk about the baby Jesus and Mary and all that stuff. What does this have to do with Christmas?” Glad you asked that. We are in the Christmas season and I bring this up because we might call this time the holi”daze.” We get so busy running around running and doing things that we need to be reminded that we could easily burnout and overdo it. There are some very comforting words in Matthew 11:28-30. If you are able, please stand as we read God’s Word.

Read Passage – Matthew 11:28-30

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Physical Effects of Stress and Burnout

This is a time in our calendar when we choose to remember the birth of Jesus and how important that is to us. I know many people argue that Jesus wasn’t really born at this time and that we are somehow hijacking a pagan holiday and traditions and using them for our religious purposes. Maybe that has some truth but the real story is that we choose to remember a super important act of God that changed history and ultimately changes our lives. I’m okay that this might not be the exact time Jesus was born. But I do know this, God acted on our behalf by sending his Son, Jesus, and we choose to express the significance of that in our life and to remember that we believe Jesus is Emmanuel; God with us.

Keeping that in mind, we noted the 7 leading causes of stress and burnout. Now lets spend a few moments recognizing that stress can have some very detrimental effects on our body. Here are the top 8 physical effects stress has on us.

51% experience fatigue

44% experience headaches

34% experience upset stomachs

30% experience muscle tension

23% experience a change in appetite

17% report grinding their teeth

15% report a change in their sex drive

13% experience dizziness

Those are some pretty staggering statistics and results. One thing that seems to be absent from the list is the effect it has on our religious life. You might not have thought about this but stress and burnout can have an effect on your religious life and your relationship with God. This should be a time of year where we spend some time resting, reflecting, and remembering the provision of God and how that we can celebrate Emmanuel, God with us.

5 Steps To A Balanced Life

So let’s look at 5 steps we can take to bring replace burnout and stress with balance and stability in our lives.

1. Pace Yourself

First, it’s very important to pace yourself. We get going so fast that we burnout. Hebrews 12:1b says:

“…let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us…” Hebrews 12:1b

We can live our lives like we are in a sprint or we can realize that we are in a long race and need to pace ourselves. Notice that Paul uses the word “perseverance.” Sprints are fast races and you burn up your energy very quickly. We need to we are in a long race and need to pace ourselves.

Ex. Claudia and my first holiday season and the one Saturday where we tried to cram everything in.

Lived in RWC.

Went to funeral in Modesto in the morning

Went to wedding in RWC in afternoon

Went to party in Oakland that night.

The thing we looked forward to most was the party with our friends in Oakland. By the time we got there, we were too exhausted to enjoy it.

We go so fast that we miss what is most important to us and what we enjoy and look forward to the most.

Question: What are you doing, maybe with good intentions, that is taking away from what is really important to us? What are we not pacing ourselves at?

2. Refuel Your Tank

The second step we can take is to refuel our tanks. We can’t be refreshed or refresh others if we are stressed and burned out. Prov. 11:25:

“A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” Prov. 11:25

If you are like me, you want to bring refreshment to people when you are around them. You want them to look forward to being with you. I don’t want to be that person that people don’t want around because it’s always so tense and uncomfortable. The solution for that is to refuel our tank. We give and work and go 100 miles an hour we burn energy and fuel. That has to be replaced.

Ex. Modern technology has given us an illustration to help up understand this; the gas tank warning light.

If you are feeling stressed and burned out, your warning light is on. God has built you with a warning light and many of us ignore it.

Ill. Talk about the stress and focus and anxiety that comes when you see that light go on in your car and how it takes so much energy until you refuel the tank. And…if you don’t refuel that tank what happens? The car won’t work anymore. The same can happen to us. It’s called a nervous breakdown.

Solution: Take some time off, refuel, re-energize.

3. Keep The Right Priorities

The third step we can put into our lives to bring balance is to keep the right priorities. Many times we run around doing things, and sometimes good things, but we have missed the things that are most important to us.

“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cumin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness.” Matthew 23:23

You might think this is a strange verse for this point. Let me explain how it relates. The Pharisee were doing some good things, like bringing their tithes to the temple. That is a good thing. But in doing so, they missed what God really wanted. He wasn’t concerned about their tithes as much as their heart so that looked good bringing their tithes but thy neglected justice, mercy and faithfulness. They thought bringing their tithes was being faithful and instead it was just an obligation.

I hate to tell you this but we fall into the same trap. We work really hard in what seems to be the right things and we have missed what is really important.

Ill. Work; we work long hours all for good reasons (like $ to provide for our family) but miss what is really important and we cause ourselves to burnout. We miss our children’s soccer games, school plays, recitals, etc. We even miss things like family dinners and time together and then wonder why our kids don’t grow up with the right priorities and ethics.

Statistic: Men have more heart attacks on Mondays (by 3 times) than any other day of the work week. Why? Don’t rest and the stress of coming back to work.

4. Understand Your Limits

The fourth step is that we need to understand our limits. Yes, we are limited in what we can do. The only one not limited is God himself. Deut. 4:35:

“You were shown these things so that you might know that the Lord is God; besides him there is no other.” Deut. 4:35

It’s a hard concept for us to grasp but we are finite beings and we really can’t do it all. The world tells us we can have it all but the reality is that we all have limitations and we should note those and then make choices that allow us to thrive within those limitations. I have listed four limitations for you here to take note of and to consider.

5 Limitations

• Physical None of us can go a month without sleep or a week!
• Emotional None of us can cope with the weight of the whole world.
• Mental None of us can process all the information around us.
• Space None of us can be in more than one place at a time.
• Time None of us can cram more than 24 hours in a day.

To me, the key is not to challenge our limitation but to understand thenm and then learn to live within them.

5. R and R

And finally, the fifth step we can take, we need to build rest and relaxation into our lives. We touched on this a few weeks ago and how God did this on the 7^th day. Jesus did it too; Mark 1:35:

“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.” Mark 1:35

Jesus had just finished healing a bunch of people. He was tired. I am sure there were more people to heal too but he need to rest. My feeling is that if it was good for Jesus, it must be good for us too. Rest is something you have to plan for. I hear way to often people who are bragging to me that they haven’t used their vacation time from work in years. That is a warning light. And planned R and R needs to be done often. I would suggest you build it into your life in three ways:

3 Times To Plan Rest

Daily

Weekly

Annually

No Regrets!

So, why the big concern? We all can get to a point of being overstressed and burnout. Here is what I want to be able to say with some confidence at the end of my life, that I have no regrets. Now I know that is hard but we can make a dent in that. Remember Pauls’ words in 2 Tim. 4:7:

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” 2 Tim. 4:7

Paul looks back and says I have no regrets. Yes he did things wrong, so do we. Yes he wanted to accomplish more, so do we. But we have something that the world doesn’t. We have a God who cares, who loves us, who wants the best for us, and who wants to help us. Remember the first first of the passage we read today:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” vs. 28

Emmanuel: God With Us!

Unleashing Hope: You Don’t Have To Go It Alone

Ecclesiastes 4:7-12

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor…” vs. 9

1 vs. 4

Does any one no who this man is? (show picture of head only) No, how about now? Well, you might not recognize him but this is El Guerrouj of Morocco who holds the world record for the mile in a of 3:43.13. You know, there was a time not to very long ago where it was believed that a man could not run the mile in under 4 minutes, that our bodies could not take such exertion and you would have a heart attack or physical breakdown. Now we see it is possible and man is reaching records we never thought possible.

So this is kind of a trick question but do you know who these four men are? They are the world record holders for the 4 x 400 meter relay (or a mile) with a time of 2:54:29 Andrew Valmon, Quincy Watts, Butch Reynolds, and Michael Johnson.

Why bring this up today? I think you could surmise from this illustration that working as a team, we can accomplish and attain things that we could never do individually. Believe it or not, this is a Biblical concept. We need other people in our life and we can do more and accomplish more when we work together. This comes from a passage in Ecclesiastes 4:7-12. If you are able, please stand as we read God’s Word.

Read Passage – Ecclesiastes 4:7-12

Again I saw something meaningless under the sun: ⁸ There was a man all alone; he had neither son nor brother. There was no end to his toil, yet his eyes were not content with his wealth. “For whom am I toiling,” he asked, “and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?” This too is meaningless—a miserable business! ⁹ Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: ¹⁰ If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. ¹¹ Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? ¹² Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Essential Equipment

There are things that we all need to survive. God created us with certain needs and certain things in our life that help us achieve things and help us get by in life. I am calling this our essential equipment. Part of the essential equipment God has given us is the relationships we have. God has put in each of us the need for relationships. One of those relationships is with God himself. Phil:4:19 says:

“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” Phil. 4:19

So we are assured in scripture that God will meet all our need. He has provided us with essentials. One of those essentials is others.

Created For Relationship

You might be thinking; How do I know you I need relationships? Well, it’s because you were created to be in relationship. Go back to the beginning. God created Adam and Adam and God were able to talk, walk together and to be in relationship with each other. But it became apparent that even in that ideal situation that Adam needed something else. You would think that just being with God would be enough but God recognized that more was needed. Notice what we read in Genesis 2:18:

“The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” Gen. 2:18

We were created to be in relationship with God and we were created to be in relationship with each other.

5 Relationships We All Need

Townsend and Cloud in their book Boundaries (p. 115) said

“We all need more than God and a best friend we need a group of supportive relationships.”

So, what we can discover this morning tis that there are 5 relationships that we all need. Sometimes you have people in your life for a season or a period and then you have other people. It’s rare to have one person there your whole life. (I am not talking about a spouse here.) here is the promise for this thought. When you are supported through a group of people you can count on and trust, you unleash more hope into your life. Here is my challenge to you this morning as we go through them:

Challenge: On your outline write down the person that fills that relationship in your life…and…also write down the name of the person for whom you fill that role in their life.

1. Vision Casters

So here we go. The first relationship that we all need is a vision caster. A vision caster is somebody who can see your potential, see what you could be, and then encourages you to move into that place. They see the bigger picture of your life. Note the words of 1 Thess. 5:11:

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thess. 5:11

A vision caster is a person who challenges us to dream big because tyhey can see the potential and the gifts and skills we have.

Ex. Marc – I had a friend like that in my life. His name was Marc and he went to be with the Lord just a few months ago. Marc, while I was still at UPS told me I should be in ministry. He said I should leave UPS and take his job. Before he resigned his position at UPS, he went to the pastor and told him he was going to need to resign and he knew the person to take his job, me! Then, while I was doing his job after I left UPS, we would play tennis twice a week and after about 2 years he told I needed to leave that job and be a pastor in a a church like this one. Marc was always able to see more in me than I could. I miss Marc. He was a vision caster.

Who is your vision caster? Who do you cast visions for?

2.  Soul Sharpeners

A second relationship we all need is a soul sharpener. A soul sharpener is someone who will work with you, challenge you, and keep you accountable to growing closer to God. This is a huge role to fill. This is the spiritual side of life. Proverbs 27:17 says:

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17

The analogy here is that as we rub up against each other we act as a file and sharpen or hone the other person. I think Solomon uses iron instead of a whetstone because he is indicating that we are made of the same substance. Think about it, there is a friction, a “rub” that can hurt and be uncomfortable but it is through that rub that we are sharpened. Also, inherent in this point is accountability. This is a pretty common method even in the world. Go to Alcohol Anonymous or Weight Watchers, or many other organizations that try to help people and they want you to team up with someone who will sharpen you and hold you accountable but also who you can call when you are feeling vulnerable and weak. They will be there for you. You need this spiritually too.

Ex. Chris – I have a guy like that in my life. Chris. Chris and I meet each week, we talk about spiritual things, we hold each other accountable and we sharpen each other. I can also call him anytime I am hurting or feeling weak or depressed, and he spiritually encourages me. He is a very valuable friend to me.

Who is your soul sharpener? Who are you a soul sharpener for?

3. Mentors

A third relationship you need is a mentor. A mentor is usually someone who is older, more seasoned, and has been through some of the things you are going through and is able to help you, advise you, and guide you in life. Notice Paul’s words in 1 Cor. 11:1:

^“Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.” 1 Cor. 11:1

One of the things I admire about Paul is that he was always mentoring someone. He must have learned this early on in his life because he always seem to be taking a younger man under his wings and working with him to teach him; especially in Paul’s case of doing ministry. We know he had Mark, Barnabas, et al. A mentor invests in someone, pours into them, teaches them the ropes, and in many ways wants the one they are mentoring to do bigger and better things than they can do.

Ex. Roger – In my life I have a guy named Roger who does that for me. We meet once a month and he used to be a pastor. He pours into me and directs me and guides me unselfishly and all for the purpose of building me up and seeing this church grow and thrive.

This is a good model for church ministry too. We should be finding people to pour into so that they can take over for us and really do so much more than we ever could.

Who is your mentor? Who are you a mentor for?

4. Heart Healers

A fourth relationship we all need is a heart healer. A heart healer is that person you can turn to in a time of need, a time of hurt, a time where you just need to be encouraged and ministered to. It’s a person who will love you no matter what. Ther is a great example of this in the Bible; David and Jonathan.

“And Jonathan had David reaffirm his oath out of love for him, because he loved him as he loved himself.” 1 Samuel 20:17

Some people have tried to make more of this relationship than what it really was. Jonathan and David were the closest for friends. They loved each other as brothers. They were always there for each other.

Here is the thing about heart healers; you are vulnerable, you have to humble yourself, you have to be open, and they will stick close. You can talk to them about anything and they will be there for you. You can be completely raw with them. The thing about a heart healer, you leave them feeling better and in a better emotional state. They minister to your heart.

Ex. Mike – In my life I have a guy named Mike. I can tell him anything and he’ll still love me. I can be completely open and honest and know I will not be judged but will be supported and cared for.

Who is your heart healer? Who are you a heart healer for?

5. Tail Kickers

And fifth, we all need that relationship that is a pretty tough one, a tail kicker. This is that person that will be brutally honest with you. They will tell you what you don’t want to hear. Don’t you love it when people make you feel good and loved and affirmed? Sure. But a tail kicker will tell you what you need to hear but in a loving, honest, and sometimes pretty straight forward way. A tail kicker is not an easy job. You have to be willing to go out on a limb and you always run the risk of being cut off or unfriended. Solomon said in Prov. 27:6:

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” Proverbs 27:6

Solomon is telling us how we love to hear nice things but someone who is willing to tell us the truth in love and in a kind manner, they are someone you can trust.

There is a great story of this in the Bible in 1 Kings 22. The Israelites have a king named Ahab. He can’t stand the prophet Micaiah because his prophesies aer always against Israel. Well Israel is about to go to war and they want to inquire of the Lord if they should and if they will be victorious. They ask all the prophets and they all say to go with God’s blessing that they will win. The king calls for Micaiah and asks him. He‘s been prepped to tell the king what he wants to hear so he says to go with God’s blessing. The king says, “Come on, tell me the truth.” So Micaiah tells him that he shouldn’t go because he will lose. Then the king says: “See, I told you he always prophesies something bad.,” and then has him thrown in prison.

A tail kicker can be a thankless job and it’s not an easy one.

Ex. Don’t have one right now

Who is your tail kicker? Who are you a tail kicker for?

Real Friends Are Worth Their Weight In Gold

So what we have discovered is that you need people like this in your life and they are not all the same person. Sometimes they are only there for a season. One warning, I am not talking about a spouse here. A spouse can fill these roles too but they can’t be everything to you all the time. As Townsend and Cloud said you need a support group. This is no slight on your spouse, it’s that we need and were created for relationships and when you have these support pillars, you have hope.

The other thing is it does take us back to the one person that can fulfill all these roles in our life, Jesus Christ.

Unleashing Hope: Refocusing On The Future

Mark 1:16-20

“Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.”  vs. 17

Back To The Future

People have been fascinated with time travel. I’m not sure when the first person thought about it was, but we like to dream and think that it can happen. H. G. Wells wrote a book back in the 1800’s called The Time Machine and that might be the more modern spark that got people thinking about the possibility of  time travel.

One thing that really got people going about this subject was a movie  that is about to celebrate its 30^th anniversary called Back To the Future. You might remember it  because it generated a series of movies that really intrigued people. To me, the first was the best. It introduced some really cool things like:

Michael J. Fox – actor who starred in Family Ties

The Flux Capacitor

The Delorean Motor Car

Christopher Lloyd the crazy professor  Brown

The Disappearing picture

I think it’s safe to say that most of us at some time have thought about time travel and have a bit of a fascination with it. It can be fun to think about the past but it can also be fun to think about what is to come in the future too.

If you are able, please stand as we read God’s Word.  Today our scripture is Mark 1:16-20.

Read Passage – Mark 1:16-20

¹⁶ As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. ¹⁷ “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.” ¹⁸ At once they left their nets and followed him.

¹⁹ When he had gone a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John in a boat, preparing their nets. ²⁰ Without delay he called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men and followed him.

Calling All Misfits!

Jesus is beginning his earthly ministry and one of the first thing he does is gather a group of people to help him. So he goes to the local synagogue and  asks for their top theological student, and he goes to the local business area and chooses a top notch guy that will help him plan and strategize his ideas, and he seeks out the up and coming achievers of his day. No! Listen again what he does do in verse 16:

“As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen.” vs. 16

No, Jesus isn’t looking for what people consider the best people for the job, he calls what seems to be a bunch of misfits. He calls some fisherman, a tax collector, a political activist, and a bunch of guys that nobody thought twice about. To us they might not look like much. But Jesus sees things differently than we do.  His vision and his plan is bigger that ours. What Jesus was looking for was not the best up and comers, he was looking for people with devotion, faith, tenacity, and the willingness to do ministry. Isn’t it interesting that they just up and leave and follow him.  In our passage it tells us the fisherman even left their father in the boat doing the work. (I’m sure that went  over well.) These guys step out in faith and trust Jesus from the get go.

Obsessed With Right Now

The guys who followed Jesus did it so quickly.  What did they see in Jesus? What was their motivation to just walk away from everything right in front of them? I think this tells us a great deal about what stops us. I suggest we get obsessed with the right now. We get so caught up in what is happening right now we miss the chance to look up ahead.  Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes 2:22-23:

“What do people get for all the toil and anxious striving with which they labor under the sun? All their days their work is grief and pain; even at night their minds do not rest. This too is meaningless.” Ecc. 2:22-23

Sometimes we can get so obsessed with the here and now that it overtakes us and stops us from moving forward.  Notice what Solomon points out about the things that keep us focused on the right now; things like toil (work), striving, grief, pain, lack of rest, etc .

Moving Toward A Fresh Vision

Jesus is calling us to change our perspective. He wants us to look at things differently. What we need is to move toward a fresh vision; a vision of what lies ahead and one that doesn’t get bogged down with the difficulties and struggles that can overwhelm and overtake us. Notice one more time Jesus words to the disciples:

“Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.”  vs. 17

I have added the underline and italics. Jesus wants us to stop being distracted with the here and now and start moving toward the future; the future he has for us. Here is why the disciples could just drop everything and follow Jesus; he will.  It’s the promise of what lies ahead. It’s not what we can do but what he will do in us.  Here are five ways we can have a fresh vision for the future.

1. Allow Yourself To Dream

First, we have to allow ourselves to dream.  What happens when we focus on the here and now and we let that be our vision, we don’t dream anymore. We lose hope. Our struggles should cause us to dream more. Solomon wrote in Ecc. 5:5:

“A dream comes when there are many cares…” Ecc. 5:5

Dreaming is not some pie in the sky thinking about something that is an impossibility, like time travel. Dreaming is thinking about what could be and what can happen.  Jesus asks us to change our perspective and that means we see things differently.  We have to trust his perspective and what he has planned. That’s why the disciples could leave right away.  They saw something in him that no one else ever had. So get this, he calls the disciples a bunch of misfits to work with him and he calls us to carry on the work. He isn’t calling the best theological students, the best book writers, the best strategists, etc. He calls the local school teacher, the UPS worker, the accountant, the store clerk, etc. He calls the everyday people doing everyday jobs to be his partner and his voice to the world. We think small. Jesus is asking us to think big. Dream big. Take his perspective.

2. Replace Apathy With Passion

The second step we can take is to replace our apathy with passion. Apathy is the lack of concern or passion. Our struggles and difficulties cause to lose our concern and care for the bigger things of life. Again, we lose hope. Paul urges us not to lose hope but to move towards passion and life. 2 Timothy 1:6 says:

“For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you…” 2 Tim. 1:6

Somehow as life goes on, we lose that passion and that concern.

Ex. Let me give you an example from something that happened this week to me. I was with the 6 boys I have in my group at Kid’s Club. Ask any group of kids who can sing and every hand goes up.  My Kid’s Club group start signing this song. One by one they take turns singing  it and they finally turn to me and tell me to try it.  I don’t kinow the song but I gave is a shot and they all laughed.

Ever notice how you can ask a group of kids who can sing and every one of them will tell you they can.  Ask them to draw and every one of them will tell you they are a great drawer. What happens between that time as kids where we think we can do anything and the time we are young adults and we give up and don’t even try?

We get negative comments,  experience doubts and failures, and eventually we give up trying. We need to fan that passion flame and get our passion back. We need to believe we can sing, draw, paint, etc. we need to believe we can be effective for God and trust him for the strength, energy, etc.

3. Replace Discouragement With Freedom

A third step we can take is to replace those discouragements with freedom.

“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”

2 Cor. 3:17

We all have ups and downs.  We all go through discouragements ; but those do not need to define us.  If you have Jesus in your life, if you have accepted him as your Lord and Savior, you have the spirit of the living God in you and if you have the spirit of the living God in you, you have freedom. You have freedom from sin, freedom from the things that weigh you down, freedom to be everything God created you to be. Grace frees us from the discouragement of the past and past failures. So much of our struggles and difficulties come from the things we do wrong and the pains of life. God brings freedom.

Ex. Young girl who was diagnosed with cancer and told she would never finish high school. Everyone discouraged her. Her psychologist met with her and his first question was: What  do you look forward to and what do you want to accomplish? It was the freedom she needed. She did graduate from high school.

4. Look Forward To Comebacks

The fourth step is to look forward to comebacks.  Now just saying that means that you have had a setback, a failure, a loss, something that didn’t go well. But do we look forward to comebacks?  James wrote in James 4:10:

“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” James 4:10

Comebacks are usually based on a failure or setback but that doesn’t have to be the end of it or the defining moment.

Ex. Let me give you an example from just a few weeks ago. I never thought I would see my favorite team, the San Francisco Giants win the World Series. I was in heaven when they won in 2010 and again in 2012.  This year most people didn’t give them a chance to win again. They made it to the 2014 WS but most people thought the Kansas City Royals would win. 49 of 50 states picked KC. Every broadcaster and analyst picked KC. Well they get to game 6 lose that game 10-0  and every one is taking gloom and doom for the Giants. What happened? Game 7 was a comeback.  They bounce back from a humiliating loss to win Game 7 and the series. OH YEAH! Look forward to comebacks!

5. Keep Moving Forward

And the 5^th step is to keep moving forward. Let me back this up with one of my favorite verses that comes from Jeremiah 29:11:

 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jer. 29:11

You can keep moving forward because God has a plan and his plan includes hope and a future. His plan is bigger, his plan is better, and we need to trust that his plans is the best and be willing to do it.

Ex. Let me illustrate with the analogy of riding a bike.  Start with story of when I learned to ride a bike and then how cool I was riding with no hands, etc. Tak about how hard it is to ride a bike that is moving really slow; unbalance, unstable, wobbly, etc. A bike moving forward and with momentum stabilizes and energizes

A Key Question To Ask Yourself: What Can I Become?

To wrap this up, let’s end with a question.  It’s a really important question too. It’s a question that can change your life. Here it is:

What can I become? You can add this “in God”

What can you become when you have God’s dreams, God’s passion, God’s freedom?  What is stopping you from looking ahead? Health? Age? Finances? Discouragements? Think about what you can become when you trust God, follow his plan, look to what’s ahead and not get  bogged down with the struggles and discouragements you might be experiencing now.

God has a plan for you, a plan for good, a plan to propser you and to give you a future and a hope.

Portions of this sermon are adapted from The Hope Quotient by Ray Johnston

Unleashing Hope: Raise Your Expectations

John 14:5-14

“Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing,

and they will do even greater things than these…” vs. 12

Gorilla Glass

Story of Steve Jobs and his idea for his new invention, the iPhone with no edge or frame. His R and dept. told him something like that is pretty much impossible and that it could not be done. They had produced a phone with a plastic front. Now this is typical Steve Jobs. Just before the iPhone release, Jobs put a halt to the production and release of the phone. He didn’t like it. Then, he remembered gorilla glass.

In the 1960s, Corning Glass had developed a very durable type of glass they called “gorilla glass”, because it was so tough. They had stopped making it, but in 2005 the CEO of Corning, Wendell Weeks, explained the material to Jobs, who immediately wanted to use gorilla glass for the first iPhone. “[Jobs] said he wanted as much gorilla glass as Corning could make within six months. ‘We don’t have the capacity,’ Weeks replied. ‘None of our plants make the glass now.’

‘Don’t be afraid,’ Jobs replied. This stunned Weeks, who was good-humored and confident but not used to Jobs’ unrealistic expectations of people. He tried to explain that a false sense of confidence would not overcome engineering challenges. Jobs stared at Weeks unblinking. ‘Yes, you can do it,’ he said. ‘Get your mind around it. You can do it.”

This also is Steve Jobs. You see, he is a visionary. Nothing was off limits or too hard or impossible. He would ask more of people than was reasonable, more than they could reasonably give, more than what seemed possible, and he would get them to do it. Now the way he went about it came with a price. People hated him. He was a tyrant, he was unreasonable, and he didn’t care about things like family, friends, or relationships.

As Weeks retold this story, he shook his head in astonishment. ‘We did it in under six months,’ he said. ‘We produced a glass that had never been made.’ Corning’s facility in Harrisburg, Kentucky, which had been making LCD displays, was converted almost overnight to make gorilla glass full-time. ‘We put our best scientists and engineers on it, and we just made it work.’ In his airy office, Weeks has just one framed memento on display. It’s a message Jobs sent the day the iPhone came out: ‘We couldn’t have done it without you.'”

Weeks is a brilliant businessman who knows how to make glass, but his initial inclination was “it can’t be done”. It was only by confronting Jobs’ challenge (and I mean really confronting it) that he and his company were able to make it happen (to his own surprise). Of course, we can’t just ignore real physical constraints, but most of the time constraints are self-imposed and say more about us than they say about actual limitations on our actions

Read Passage – John 14:5-14

⁵ Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” ⁶ Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. ⁷ If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.” ⁸ Philip said, “Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us.” ⁹ Jesus answered: “Don’t you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? ¹⁰ Don’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you I do not speak on my own authority. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. ¹¹ Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me; or at least believe on the evidence of the works themselves.¹² Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father. ¹³ And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.¹⁴ You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.

When Things Don’t Go The Way You Want

Last week we looked at recharging our batteries and when we do that it helps unleash hope. Another issue that can stop us from unleashing hope is the difficulty we have when things don’t go the way we want. Notice verse 56:.

“Thomas said to him, ‘Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?’” vs. 5

What’s going on here is the Israelites have been waiting a long time of the Messiah. This is something that is taught to them as young children and it’s the hope of their nation. During Jesus time it was a very low point in their history. Over the last 400 years they had been taken over by four different nations, they had been manipulated, abused, and treated like second class people. They now lived under Roman rule and they were oppressed. They really want their Messiah more than ever. Their idea of the Messiah is that he would establish a military rule and overtake the Romans and re-establish Israel as a nation. He would once again make Israel prominent and important in the world. Thomas is confused here. He thought he was going to do all these things and now he is talking about going away. What do you mean going away? This was really confusing and not at all what they thought would happen, not what they wanted to happen.

That’s like life. We have our ideas about what should happen, how things should go, and dare I say it, how God should work. When it doesn’t go the way we want, when we hit stumbling blocks or obstacles, it can be deflating, confusing and stop us in our track. It stops us from moving forward.

Ex. Losing weight. We do well for a while, hit a stumbling block and we get frustrated and upset and go back to what we were doing that isn’t good for us.

How To Raise Your Expectations

We can also lose hope. How can we change that? What can we do to unleash hope and keep us moving forward? This morning, let’s look at what we can do to raise our expectations so we can unleash hope and continue to move forward.

1. Believe Impossible Things Are Possible

First, we can believe that the impossible is possible. Let me challenge you with a question on this: What is the impossibility in your life? Is it a relationship that needs to be restored? A job? A marriage in turmoil? A financial situation that seems overwhelming? Many things in life seem impossible. You can choose to look at them in a different way. Jesus said in Matt. 19:26:

“Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26

Now the key comes in the middle of the verse. It’s a little prepositional phrase right in the middle…”with God.”   When we choose to put our trust in God and what he can do, all things are possible. This is not a false hope for things that we desperately want to happen. This is choosing not to limit God. This is giving up our ideas and goals for what we want to happen and trusting and believing in God that his plan will work and that he will provide what is best for our lives.

2. Believe Better Days Are Ahead

Believing the impossible is possible with God helps look forward and that is the second way to raise our expectations: believe that better days are ahead. Many of us spend a lot of time with our focus in the rear view mirror. Ecc. 7:10 says:

“Do not say, ‘Why were the old days better than these?’ For it is not wise to ask such questions.’” Ecc. 7:10

This passage is talking about looking back. You know, remember the good old days? Here is the problem with keeping our focus on the rear view mirror, we miss what is about to come.

Ill. Think about those people who live in the good old days, like high school. When you are 18 and you are remembering high school and the fun that’s okay. When you are in your 40’s, 50’s, and 60’s and your are still living your glory days of high school? Not good.

What if I told you better days are ahead? Listen to what Jesus promises us in John 10:10:

“I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10

His words are meant as encouragement. He wants us to know that despite our circumstances, despite what we might see as limitations, despite what we feel is confusing and a struggle, we can still live a full and abundant life.

3. Realize The Power Of Perspective

A third key to raising our expectations is to realize the power of perspective. If we only look at our perspective and our goals, we will be disappointed. We need to ask God for his perspective and choose to look at things the way he sees them. Let me relate this through a story from a guy in the Bible named Nehemiah. Nehemiah is a guy who was a cupbearer to the king of Babylon. So his job is to taste the king’s food, taste the king’s drinks, and make sure they are not poisoned. Kind of sounds like a cush job but you have to realize you could die at any time. Literally, your next meal could be your last. Now he is an Israelite. Jerusalem had been destroyed 92 years earlier. That’s 92 years of failure, 92 years of disappointment, 92 years of being enslaved to another nation. He is upset because of this and God comes to him and says he wants him to rebuild the city. How can he do that as a slave? One day he is standing before the king and this happens in Neh. 2:4-5:

“The king said to me, “What is it you want?” Then I prayed to the God of heaven, ⁵ and I answered the king, “If it pleases the king and if your servant has found favor in his sight, let him send me to the city in Judah where my ancestors are buried so that I can rebuild it.” Neh. 2:4-5

Notice a few things about this. First, Nehemiah wanted what God wanted. Second, when the critical point comes of talking to the king, first thing he does is pray. This wasn’t a long drawn out, go to your room and pray thing. It was a quick, under your breath, God be in this situation prayer. And his desire was to do what God wants.

One caution: I see a lot of people who desire something and then try to make it God’s will. God want s me to… Be careful with that. One way to test yourself on this is to think about where you want the glory to go. When you have God’s perspective you want him to have the glory too!

4. Replace Fear With Faith

When we take God’s perspective on things, we begin to move forward and we replace fear with faith and that faith leads to action.

Again, let’s look at a story from the Bible on this. David is a young shepherd boy. His brothers are in the Israelite army and they are out facing the Philistine’s. The Philistines have this big old dude named Goliath. He’s huge. He is literally a giant and every day the Israelite army stands on one side and the Philistine on the other and Goliath issues a challenge for anyone to fight him. If the Israelite wins, they will become their slaves. If he wins, the Israelites become their slaves. So how do the Israelites feel about this? 1 Samuel 17:10:

“On hearing the Philistine’s words, Saul and all the Israelites were dismayed and terrified.”

1 Sam. 17:10

Fear grips them. They are terrified and it’s affected them mentally too, they are dismayed. That means they are demoralized and feel defeated already. Fear gripped them. Now some fear can be good. Some fear can cause us to run faster, be bolder, and challenge us to do better. David has gone to visit his brothers and he has seen what they are going through, what shape the army is in and that no one will stand up to Goliath. His faith is bigger than his fear.   He takes that fear and gives it to God and faces that fear head on. Look down a few verses to verse 3454 and we see his faith:

“David said to the Philistine, “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty…” 1 Sam. 10:45

David’s fear doesn’t paralyze him. Fear has a way of doing that. David’s fear drives him to a deeper faith in God and trust in God. Faith trumps fear. Faith drives us to action.

5. Replace “What If?” With “Why Not?”

And finally, to raise our expectations we need to replace the question in our minds of “What if?” with “Why not?” This point is driven home in the passage we read today in verse 12:

“Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these…” vs. 12

Jesus promises that we will do these things. We have his spirit in us and his spirit fills us with his power. Too many times in life we are stifled by asking “what if” and we don’t act on things because we haven’t see the possibly of what we can do.

People who missed what was to come because they failed to ask “Why not?”

Lee De Forest – Inventor of the Cathode ray Tube, 1926

While theoretically and technically television may be feasible, commercially and financially it is an impossibility, a development which we need waste little time dreaming.

Marshal Ferdinand – WW1 Military strategist, 1904

Airplanes are interesting toys but are of no military value.

Businessweek 1958

With over 50 foreign cares already on sale her, the Japanese auto industry isn’t likely to carve out a big slice of the U.S. market.

Recording Company Expert, 1962

We don’t think the Beetles will do anything in their market. Guitar groups are on their way out.

Raise Your Expectations and Hope Will Soar

If you find yourself with little hope or discouraged, a key to unleashing hope is to raise your expectations. Raise your expectations and your hope will soar.

Portions of this sermon are adapted from The Hope Quotient by Ray Johnston

Unleashing Hope: Recharge Your Batteries

Genesis 2:2-3

“…so on the seventh day he (God) rested from all his work.” vs.2b

My Daily Shave

I have a daily routine I go through. It almost always starts the same way. I have two alarms set; one electric and my phone so that if the electricity goes out I still wake up on time. My alarm goes off and as I awake I move to the side of the bed and sit for just a moment. From there I go into the bathroom and pull out my shaver, this one here. This is a rechargeable shaver. It works great when the battery is fully charged.

In fact, I thought I might as well take a picture of me shaving in the morning; here it is.

(Picture of young handsome guy shaving) (Wait for laughs)

Yes, I look much younger and more handsome and I have a lot more hair. But hey, that’s how I roll, or roll out of bed, in the morning.

My shaver is a rechargeable one. When it is fully charged, it works fantastic. It’s fast, it glides better and it does its job fantastically. But when the battery is low, when it slows down and is running out of juice, it pulls at my whiskers which hurts, it doesn’t cut nearly as well, and shaving is not so easy. In fact, it’s kind of a pain. When that happens, I pull out the cord, plug it into the wall, and let it charge for a few hours. When the little green light goes on and says it is fully charged, I am good to go again for a week so and shaving is a breeze.

We live in a world where lots of things work this way. They have rechargeable batteries and in order for us to use them properly, they need to be charged and recharged. You and I work the same way even though we don’t run on batteries. In fact, this is a practice that goes all the way back to the beginning of time. Let’s look at how God talks about this in Genesis 2:2-3. If you are able, please stand as we read God’s Word.

Read Passage – Genesis 2:2-3

“By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. ³ Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.”

If It’s Good Enough for God…

How do we determine if something is good for us? Maybe because we read it somewhere, we listen to people who have done something and it worked for them, or there is some proof that it helps us. So why do we look at Genesis 2 today? Here is one way to determine that something is good for us; If it’s good enough for God, it must be good enough for us. So if God does something and it helps him, why wouldn’t it help us too? Notice what takes place in these verses. God has been working hard. He has been creating; not just anything, but the whole world, universe and everything in them. Verse 2 ends with these words; “…so on the seventh day God rested from all his work.”

“By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.” vs. 2

Now I want to be careful here. I am not suggesting that God got tired. If God is really God, which I believe He is, then I doubt he gets tired. But…notice that God builds in breaks. He builds in times of rest. He rested. When we rest it rejuvenates us and helps us. And if God built in breaks for himself, why are we so resistant to breaks for us?

We live in a very fast paced world. Many people struggle to take time for themselves and breaks to rejuvenate themselves. In many ways much of the world pushes us hard.

We are pushed hard in our jobs

We are pushed hard in our personal lives

We are pushed hard in our hobbies

We are pushed hard in just about everything we do. Most of the time nobody will insist you to take a break and rejuvenate your batteries and your energy. Some do but they are far and few between. Many times we are our own worst enemies. We push ourselves and feel we have to keep going when we need a break.

Ex. Breaks needed while working on a computer. It is suggested that we take a short break every -20-30 minutes while working on a computer. Most of us don’t and then we wonder why are sore, why we are burnt out, and why we are exhausted when really we feel like we have just been sitting all day. Most experts tell us:

Take short 1-2 minute stretch breaks every 20-30 minutes. After each hour of work, take a break or change tasks for at least 5-10 minutes

How To Recharge Your Batteries

Now that is one of the more simple fixes in life. What about our lives as a whole? What would it take to recharge your batteries? God’s Word guides us in this. God created us. He knows how we work and what helps us and is best for us. So let’s look at a few ways God guides us on recharging your batteries.

• Plan, Plan, Plan For Rest

First, you have to plan, plan, plan for rest. Remember our passage from today. God purposefully planned a day of rest in his schedule. Then he did it for us too. He built in a day of rest, a Sabbath, for us. That day that is to be different from all the others. He even built this into the land the people were using for crops. Every 7^th year they were supposed to let the land lay fallow so it could rest and rejuvenate. Here’s the key: plan. It won’t happen by accident. It has to be intentional. Recharging your batteries gives you more strength, more drive, and a better focus and it allows you to bring renewed energy to what you are doing. Solomon wrote in Prov. 21:5:

“The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.” Prov. 21:5

Solomon is pointing out that if we don’t plan, we can run into ruin and difficulty.

When we plan, it can lead to a greater gain. Not just gain in energy but in our profits as well. Most of us have hear the saying:

No plan is a plan to fail

Challenge: When is the last time you planned a break? Many people get proud they don’t use their vacation or the time their company provides for them to charge their batteries. How about you?

As I said, we live in a fast paced world. We feel the pressure and we put the pressure on ourselves to work, produce and sometimes just keep going. Be careful. You were built to have breaks. You were created to need recharging. You need to plan for rest.

• Renew Yourself In Worship

A second step in recharging your batteries is to renew yourself in worship. Again, you were created to worship. Worship brings renewal, focus, and rest. Romans 12:1 says:

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.” Romans 12:1

Unfortunately as our world has progressed, we have these expectations that we are to be running 24/7. It used to be that Sunday was a day of rest. Stores, gas stations, and restaurants were closed. Now businesses are trying to get the edge, trying to one up their competition, and trying to get as much profit as possible. Sunday has become just like the other days of the week.

Ex. Another example of this is Thanksgiving and stores opening on Thanksgiving and offering huge discounts to get you in. Stores are opening at 6 p.m. on thanksgiving Day.

Worship is super important. Worship keeps us focused on God; focused on his will and his plan for our life. Worship encourages us by being together with each other, in relation to God and it can be uplifting. Worship renews us. It brings life and peace and joy and hope.

• Let The Word Be Your Guide

A third step in recharging your batteries is to have the right guides in your life and a great guide is the word of God. Sometimes people are at a loss of how to proceed forward in their lives. They’ve lost hope, they’ve lost perspective, and they feel tired and burnt. One important step in renewal is to have a vision and plan for where you want to be. God tells us in His Word that we have that guideline by spending time reading and allowing His Word to guide us. David says in Psalm 119:105:

“Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” Psalm 119:105

We can get sidetracked by our own thoughts, by our own ways of doing things and by our own plans. David’s words encourage us to know that God’s Word is our guide and the source that lights our way. You may get distracted by thinking that every scenario that you encounter is not in the Bible. It’s not that every scenario is listed or talked about but more that it lights our path. In other words, it shows us the proper way(s) to respond to the specific scenarios that we encounter and in those times, we have a personal responsibility to make the decision(s) on what to do. When that happens, we are renewed because we feel the affirmation of God and assurance that we are on the right path.

Ex. For example, can the Bible really tell me what I should be doing with my life? Yes,

• Build Great Relationships

A fourth step in recharging our batteries is to build great relationships into our life. Note this: Jesus built great relationships while her on earth. He went out and developed relationships with people because we are created to be in relationship. We are never meant to be alone. Jesus is in relationship to God the Father and God the Holy Spirit. He is also in relationship with us. That is why when he is praying in John 17 that he says he has to die and go to heaven, so we can have the Holy Spirit. Jesus couldn’t stay with us forever but the Holy Spirit can. Jesus had three really close friends he poured himself into; James, John and Peter. Beyond that he had 12 disciples he invested in. Beyond that he had many people who walked with him and encouraged them and he in turn encouraged them.

1 Thess. 5:11 says:

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”

1 Thess. 5:11

Here is a key ingredient for building great relationships: encouragement. You never go wrong when you take the time to invest in someone else by encouraging them. Think about those that you think of as good/great friends. They are people who probably support you, love you, take the time to be with you, might even confront you when things need to be brought to your attention. But most of all, they are probably people who encourage you. They build you up. And…here is the kicker on this; when you encourage someone else, you are not just building them up, you are recharging your batteries. It’s good for you too.

Ex. How I met Chris and built our friendship

• Listen! God’s With You

And finally, you can recharge your batteries by being a person who listens; and more specifically, listens to God. I stated this earlier and I’ll state it again, we live in a busy world and we are taught to be active and on the go. This finds its way into our relationships as well. We talk with people but usually in short spurts. We seem to always have to be getting somewhere. We need to stop and listen. How many times have you hard “Oh, let me just get this in before I have to go.” Very rarely do you hear, “”Is there anything else you want to tell me before we go?” This even works its way into our relationship with God. Just ask someone to pray and watch what happens, they start talking. Ever been with someone who hesitates or waits before they talk? People think they maybe have forgotten what they were asked to do or that there is something wrong. I propose to you today that we need to spend more time listening to God. Jesus many times said these words we find in Matt. 11:15:

“Whoever has ears, let them hear.”  Matt. 11:15

I want to encourage you to take time to listen to God. It’s not easy. It takes practice, an open heart, a willingness to just clear your mind and discern to what where God is directing you. I find I listen to God best when I get away from everything and clear my head.

Sometimes it’s a walk around the block

Sometimes it’s a walk in the hills or by the ocean

Sometimes it’s a walk around the parking lot

Sometimes its laying in bed with the lights and TV off

Sometimes its kneeling at the front of the church

Respect God enough to not always give him a monologue of your wants, desires, and wishes. Take time to listen.

Challenge: If you are not listening to God, who are you listening to?

Praying For Ice Cream

A young mother took her child to a restaurant. He asked if he could say grace, although he never did anything quietly. He bowed his head and prayed so loud the entire restaurant could hear him: “God is good, God is great. Lord, I thank you for the food and I will thank you even more when Mom gets me ice cream for dessert! And liberty and justice for all. Amen.”

Some customers laughed, but a cranky woman nearby said loud enough for all to hear, “Kids these days! Asking god for ice cream? He should be ashamed!”

Hearing this, the boy burst into tears and said, “Mommy? Did I say something wrong?” Is God mad at me?” As she reassured him, a gentleman approached the table. He leaned close to the kid, winked, and said, “Young man, I happen to know God . And I happen to know God thought that was a terrify prayer.”

“Really?” the boy said. “Absolutely.” Then the man turned toward the cranky woman and said, “Too bad she doesn’t ask God for ice cream. A little ice cream is god for the soul sometimes.”

At the end of the meal, the mom bought her son the biggest dish of ice cream the restaurant served. His eyes lit up when it was placed in front of him. Without a word, he picked it up, walked over to the cranky lady, and said, “Here ma’am. This is for you. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes. My soul is good already!”

The first, most important pathway to hope is to figure our what recharges your batteries and then do that.

Portions of this sermon are adapted from The Hope Quotient by Ray Johnston

To Fast Or Not To Fast
Matthew 6:16-18
“But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face…” vs. 17

The Monkeys Go Fasting
Show clip of the monkey video

Read Passage – Matthew 6:16-18
16 “When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 17 But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, 18 so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

The Temptation To Skip It
I thought you might enjoy that video; it was kind of goofy and fun but it also addressed what we are talking about today; fasting. I know for me, fasting has always been one of those things I heard about and was even encouraged to do but never really understood why or exactly what to do. I grew up in a Plymouth Brethren church and they told us to do it but never really gave particulars. I was tempted when we got to this section just to skip talking about it but then I thought, well, lets see what other pastors have said about this and how they preached about it. Interestingly enough, most skipped it. There wasn’t a lot of material on it. But I knew Jesus talked about it for a reason so I dug a little deeper and decided it was an important thing to figure out why Jesus was addressing this.

Spiritual Disciplines
Actually, fasting is considered a “spiritual discipline.” If you are like me when you hear the word discipline I think “ouch!” discipline is something that hurts. A spiritual discipline is more of a spiritual refinement or spiritual training in a way to build our character or behavior; it is meant to build us up spiritually. It really is a way in which a Christian trains themselves to experience God in a deeper way. Forms of spiritual discipline can be committing to a reading plan, prayer, Scripture memorization, etc .

Ex. The way that gold was refined in ancient days, was the ore was placed in a great cauldron with fire underneath it, as it heated up, the ore would melt, and all the impurities would rise to the surface. The smelter would then skim off the impurities, the dross. But he wasn’t finished there, he would stock the fire more and more impurities would rise to the top. He would skim those off, and heat it up more. He would continue this process until the gold was pure. And it is said that he knew that the gold was pure when he could see his reflection in the gold.

The difference with this gold example and ourselves is that we voluntarily commit ourselves to the discipline where fore the gold it is done to it; but you get the idea. It even begs the question:
Are we willing going to choose to discipline ourselves?

I would suggest that we do discipline ourselves when it is something we want. If we want to achieve a certain level of something for our job, for a sport, for an art (like playing an instrument), etc. we discipline ourselves to school, practice, etc. to train ourselves. It seems with fasting the issue comes in our understanding of it.

The Purposes Of Fasting
First, lets look at the purposes of fasting. It’s hard to commit ourselves to something if we don’t understand why we are doing it and what benefits it brings to our lives.

A. To Center On God
One purpose of spiritual fasting is to center on God. It is to bring God to the forefront of our thoughts, our day and our actions. And, it is to keep our thoughts on him. We can do a lot of things for a lot of reasons but when we commit to fasting for spiritual purposes it is to center on God. It’s important not just to do something for the sake of just doing it or because it has always been done that way. Israel fell into that trap and God, through Zechariah asks them in Zech. 5:7:

“…was it really for me that you fasted?” Zechariah 7:5

The Israelites had gotten into the practice of fasting but not to center on God but to fulfill a ritual. When that happens it doesn’t really achieve the purpose of drawing ourselves to God, it is more of a pride thing to say “look what I have done and how good I am.”
Ex. Memorizing Scripture to show off how much Scripture you know. Note: It is good to memorize Scripture but we can do it with the wrong intention.

B. To Remind Us Who Sustains Us
Another purpose for fasting is to remind us who sustains us. We can easily become too dependent on food to be our sustainer. Now food is good and it does, the right food of course, bring our body health, nutrition, and the essentials we need to be healthy but when we commit to fasting, it reminds us that our true sustenance comes from God himself. Paul reminds us in Colossians 1:17:

“He (God) is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” Colossians 1:17

Sometimes we need to do things to remind us that God is our sustainer. We get comfortable and used to providing for ourselves, to filling our needs, and for other things to give us value and worth. Fasting is meant to remind us that God is our sustainer.
Ex. Tithing – much in the same way that tithing is meant to remind that God is our provider. We have material things and bringing a portion of that to God is acknowledging his provision and expressing our dependency as well.

C. To Disrupt The Norm
And a third purpose of fasting is to disrupt our norm. It’s meant to kind of throw us for a jolt, disrupt our routine and kind of mix things up a bit. We can become complacent and fall into routines that may tend to not acknowledge God in the everyday flow of our life. Fasting kind of makes us rethink how we spend our time, what our habits are, good or bad, and bring us back to a focus on God. It’s meant to turn us to God. Psalm 17:6 says:

“I call on you, my God, for you will answer me; turn your ear to me and hear my prayer.”
Psalm 17:6

We can get to a point where the non-essentials of life take control. Fasting can help keep the natural desires of our human selves in check and balance. In a sense fasting can drive us to our knees and to change our focus.
Ex. The work world – Boss comes in one day and has a sessions where you rethink the focus and purpose of your company and what you are doing. Just mixes things up a bit and disrupts the norm.

Warning: When It’s Not The Right Purpose
With that understanding of the purpose of fasting, we can look back at verse 16 and Jesus’ words of warning make a lot more sense:

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting.” vs. 16

Jesus is warning the disciples and the crowd that is listening that you can fast for the wrong reasons. The church leaders were not fasting for the right purpose. Jesus even tells us what their purpose was; to draw attention to themselves. In fact, the more they could embellish the fact that they were fasting, the better it was because it would draw more attention to themselves and that was their reward.

Also take notice that the church leaders, who Jesus was calling “hypocrites” were making themselves look disfigured and drawn. That was so that they would draw more attention to themselves and be notice. That is the wrong reason for doing a fast. In fact, that became their reward. They got what they wanted.

Considering Fasting
So our decision today is to consider fasting. Consider doing something that will enhance your spiritual life; something that will help center you on God, mind you of your dependency on God and help regain that focus that you might be desiring. If you are thinking to yourself, “Why?” let’s go back to verses 17-18 for that answer:

“But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” vss. 17-18

Notice the first few words are “but when you fast…” not “if you fast.” Jesus is encouraging us to fast and expects it to be a part of our life. He expected the disciples to fast and he expects his followers to fast.

Now I do need to say one thing; fasting should be done with careful consideration and I would even say that you should consult your physician. Many people have health conditions that need to be considered and accounted for. Many people have lifestyles that could make it difficult to fast. So please, consult your physician. Get some guidance and some advice from a professional who knows you and understands what you are dealing with in your life. That being said, you also need to consider something else; what to do with the time you would normally spend eating. We spend a lot of our day preparing and eating food. When you go on a fast, consider what you will do with that time and I would even say consider how you might use it to draw closer to God. You could be gaining anywhere from an hour to 3 hours a day. And, if you normally sit down with family or friends during your meals, consider how that will affect them. I would suggest that sitting and watching them eat will not help you with your fast. It might make it more difficult. Here are some ideas you might want to jot down that will help you fill the time and focus on God:
-Prayer walks (walking will help your physical health as well and it’s okay to do)
-Directed reading plan (Choose a book of the Bible or specific passage to focus on)
-Serving (some activity to help others)

You also need to consider the length of the fast. You can do anything from a meal to a day to 40 days. I think most people would encourage a least a day to really get the full affect. If you start at sundown of one day and go to sundown of the next that can make it easier too. Just don’t eat at night after the sun goes down and then your soon asleep and that can cover the next 6 – 8 hours.

So just what kinds of fasts should you consider? Here are four that are the most typical.

• Normal Fast
First is what I call the normal fast. The normal fast is where you give up solid foods but not necessarily liquids. You can still drink things that give your body nutrition and the vitamins you need to have the proper energy and stamina. So you drink things like V8 Vegetable drinks, fruit juices, vitamin drinks like enhanced water, etc. This seems to be the kind of fast that Jesus might have gone one in Matthew. It says in verses 4:1-2:

“Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry.” Matt. 4:1-2

Notice when Jesus fast is done that Satan tempts him with bread. He had given up solid food. It never really tells us if Jesus gave up liquids. Some assume he did and others assume he did not.
One of the good things about this kind of fast is that you can choose to take the money you would spend on food and give it to a charity or shelter to help others who are in need.

• Partial Fast
A second type of fast is a partial fast. This is a time where you give up certain foods like meat, sweets, alcohol, etc. We see this in Scripture from Daniel:

“At that time I, Daniel, mourned for three weeks. I ate no choice food; no meat or wine touched my lips; and I used no lotions at all until the three weeks were over.” Daniel 10:2-3

Daniel did this ealier in his life as well when he and his buddies were in the kings service and he asked to eat none of the kings food only vegetables. It is interesting as well that in this passage it says that Daniel used no lotions as well and that this fast was for 3 weeks.

Some people do this today around lent. They give up a certain food for lent as a way of focusing on God. The Roman Catholic Church is good at encouraging this and other religions do this as well.
Ex. When I was in Jr. High school and I met John McDaniel and he gave up sweets for Lent . I had never heard of that before but it was interesting and lead me to think about doing something similar.

• Absolute Fast
The third type is the hardest of them all and that is the absolute feast. That’s where you give up everything, solid foods as well as liquids. Caution: this should not be done for an extended period. Our bodies need water and nutrients and these kinds of fasts should be done for shorter periods. If you remember, Esther did this kind of fast. Remember she was a queen and a Jew in a foreign country, Persia. When a bounty is put out on the Jews heads and the call is to kill them, she goes to her uncle Mordecai and says in verse 4:16:

“Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my attendants will fast as you do.” Esther 4:16

Dire times call for drastic circumstances and that is what happens here. Notice also that it is for 3 days. A shorter period of time and for a specific reason.

• Corporate Fast
Finally, there is the corporate fast. That is where a group of people are committed to a fast and again, usually for a specific cause or reason. We find one of these types of fasts in the book of Ezra in 8:21:

“There, by the Ahava Canal, I proclaimed a fast, so that we might humble ourselves before our God and ask him for a safe journey for us and our children, with all our possessions.“ Ezra 8:21

Here there was some traveling about to take place and the people fasted to humble themselves and seek God’s protection on their trip. Pretty cool. A good example of this might be when a church proclaims a fast to seek God on a particular task or event. The great thing about something like this fast is that you are doing together and you can encourage each other and you have a common experience to draw on.

Draw Near To God
Hopefully those 4 types of fasts help you consider what you might want to do or try. But really, here is the bottom line; in our lives we should be seeking ways to draw near to God. Drawing near to God is not just going to somehow happen. We are encouraged in James 4:8 to draw near to God:

“Come near to God and he will come near to you.” James 4:8

This is an awesome promise from God. If you draw near to him, he will draw near to you. There are no “if’s” or “buts” or “maybe’s” in this verse. It’s a promise. We were created to be in relationship with God and he wants to be close to us and he wants us to get close to him. We do that in a lot of ways, you ar doing it by being here this morning, going to church, we draw close to God in prayer, in reading etc. Maybe now you might consider trying out a fast and drawing close to God that way.

Broken and Restored Relationships

Matthew 5:31-32

“You did not choose me, but I chose you…” John 15:16

#1 Marriage Destroyer

Anybody want to guess what the number one destroyer of marriages is? (wait for response)

Two psychologists, Cliff Notarius of Catholic University and Howard Markman of the University of Denver took on a project of trying to uncover the processes that destroy marriages. They studied couples over the course of years, and even decades, and retraced the steps of those who have split up back to their wedding day. What they are discovering is unsettling. None of the factors you would guess could predict a couple’s durability: not how in love a newlywed couple say they are; how much affection they exchange; how much they fight or what they fight about. In fact, couples who will make it and those who don’t look remarkably similar in the early days. They found a very subtle but telling difference at the beginning of the relationships. Of the couples who would ultimately make it, 5 out of every 100 comments made about each other were insults. Among couples who would later split (divorce), 10 of every 100 comments were insults. That gap magnified over the following decade, until couples heading downhill were flinging five times as many cruel and invalidating comments at each other as happy couples. “Hostile putdowns act as cancerous cells that, if unchecked, erode the relationship over time,” says Notarius, who with Markman co-authored the new book We Can Work It Out.

“In the end, relentless unremitting negativity takes control and the couple can’t get through a week without major blowups.”

U.S. News & World Report, February 21, 1994, p. 67

Read Passage – Matthew 5:31-32

³¹ “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’  ³² But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

The Indecency Clause

This is the third antithesis of this section of the Sermon on the Mount and the main issue Jesus addresses in this antithesis is the sanctity of marriage. Jesus is addressing the issue of divorce from Deut. 24:1 which reads:

“If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house…” Deut. 24:1

Why address this? Divorce had become a widespread phenomenon in the ancient world and he had Moses address the issue to:

1)      Protect the sanctity of marriage.

2)      Protect women who were being dismissed without any real cause

3)      Make sure a woman who was divorced had a way to remarry and not be thought of as a harlot or runaway adulteress, i.e. otherwise a single woman would not be able to provide for herself or sustain she and her family.

And don’t forget what God said about it; it was man’s hardness of heart. Some of the issues were that this was a male dominated world so men could divorce women but woman couldn’t divorce men, the women didn’t have that right. This was a big issue for women because that had no way to provide for themselves or be financially independent. So this law became important because to actually get a certificate of divorce, although it was a stigma and the woman might be looked at as used goods, it did allow woman to remarry. The real problem came in the interpretation of the law. When was it okay to divorce and when was it not okay?

The Torn-Apart Marriage

So Jesus goes back to the original intention and quotes this Mosaic law in verse 31:

“It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’” vs. 31

This was a big problem in Jesus’ day as well because it had go0tten worse over the years. The legalism of the religious leaders didn’t help, they definitely took the man’s side.

Ex. The woman caught in adultery that they bring to Jesus to trap him. Where is the man?

The more liberal school of Israelites called the “Hillel” stated that a man could divorce his wife for any reason of indecency, that’s from the word “displeasing” that we see in Deut. 24:1. A good example of this would be something to the affect that if a woman cooked a meal that did not meet her husband’s specifications it could be considered “displeasing” and he could divorce her. It’s easy to see that men of that day would have taken advantage of this.

Ex. The reason for divorce that we have heard of in our day that the toothpaste cap was left off the toothpaste tube.

Jesus wants to get back to what God’s intention of marriage that is be a permanent union between a man and a woman. Interestingly, this is the 2^nd time Jesus says this in this section of Scripture. In 5:27-28 he states his concern about adultery and he uses the word “moicheuo” interpreted adultery. In verse 31 here, he uses the word “porneia” also interpreted adultery. Porneia includes any sinful activity that intentionally divides the marital relationship. Jesus really wants to protect marriage and make sure that anyone taking the sacred vows of marriage is not making a sham of the relationship.

The Views Of Divorce

Let me just stoop for a minute and say this is a really uncomfortable subject to preach on. People really get heated up about this topic and if you don’t agree the emotions become really intense. I have taught quite a few classes on this subject and almost every time someone has come us to me and either been really upset with me or felt I just missed the point all together. Here’s an interesting thing about this subject, people fall into one of three categories on it: They are:

1. No cause for divorce

2. One cause for divorce

3. Many causes for divorce

And…even more interesting is that they pretty much use the same Biblical passages to support their stance. So again, it comes down to how you interpret it.

Here is the bottom line on this subject: God instituted the union of marriage between a man and a woman. His desire is that we take those vows seriously. Most people today still take those vows asking for God’s blessing on their union. Divorce is falling short of that ideal. For some reason, when we fall short in this area, many people fail to see any area of grace and forgiveness. You can be a liar, a cheat, a thief, etc. and people will forgive you. But for some reason, people are very unforgiving and understanding about divorce.

Ex. This hits really close to home for me. My grandmother went to church regularly an d six months after my mother was born, her husband, my grandfather, had an affair, took off and divorced my grandmother. She was kicked out of her church because she was divorced. It’s called excommunication. She had done nothing wrong yet the church wouldn’t let her worship there because of her divorce. This had repercussions for years in my family. It drove my grandmother from her faith and it had a lot of negative — in her family. My mom went to church as a child but not in her teen years and it was only after I was born that my mom went back to church. I owe my Christian heritage to my mom willing to go back to church. My grandmother came back to Christ in the last weeks of her life.

So what are we to do when it comes to this passage? We need to realize that relationships are hard. They take work. Relationships can be strained and let’s face it, some break up. But here is the good news and what I really feel about his topic: God is a God who forgives. God is a God who restores broken relationships. And God gives us guidance on how to keep our relationships fresh and moving in the right direction. I realize some of you may have gone through the difficult process of divorce. I also want you to feel that love, grace, and forgiveness that God brings to you and hope that these words of Christ move you toward a deeper commitment in your relationships and in your relationship with God himself.

A God Of Restoration In…

So what can you and I do to move toward building our relationships and in the process, maybe help us to avoid or lessen the chances that our marriages end in divorce? Here are some steps right from God’s Word. It’s broken down into two areas: internal and external.

Internal

•  Priorities

The first internal step is setting your priorities; the things that are important to you and thenm committing to them. Believe it or not, you are a priority to God. Long before you were, long before you had a chance to know right from wrong, long before you could fathom God, he choose you and made you one of his priorities. John 15:16 says:

“You did not choose me, but I chose you…” John 15:16

You are a priority to God. How can you set priorities? Here aer some tips on doing that:

1. Set goals
2. Build good habits into your life
3. Commit to conflict resolution
4. Be willing to say “no” to things
5. Be willing to work at what is important

Ex. Franklin-Covey daily planning organizer. List tasks, assign priority letters, i.e. A, B,C, etc. then assign numbers to accomplish, 1, 2, 3, etc. GO TO WORK!

Ill. What this looks like in a marriage: goals like lifetime commitment, buying a house, having time together, build in habits of spending time together, don’t let anger fester and build, talk things out and commit to love, and work hard.

• Thoughts

The second internal step is in your thought life. Your thoughts and your thought life is not just taking things as they come and a hap hazard thing. It is important to know that you can control your thought life an discipline your mind to think in a certain way. This is especially true when it comes to relationships. How you think about others goes a long way to building your relationships. Galatians 5:14 says:

“For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Galatians 5:14

There are a few things we can do to help our thought life.

1. Keep your mind from harmful things
2. Choose to think about good and positive things

Ex. Your spouse: Choose to keep your mind pure and focused on them. Keep your mind away from inappropriate thoughts of other, keep way from harmful things that put negative thoughts in your mind, and then choose to focus on the things you love about your spouse and the good qualities they bring to your life.

External

Now things take a turn from the internal and they work themselves out into the external.

• Words

The first of the external steps is to speak the words that are helpful, encouraging and that build up. 1 Thess. 5:11 says:

“Encourage one another and build each other up…” 1 Thess. 5:11

Unfortunately too many times our words only come out on special days like birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries and even then we sometimes write them down and don’t speak them.

Challenge: Speak kind and encouraging words – call them in the middle of the day, spend a moment at the end of each day to tell them how much you appreciate them and love them, or how about aloud in front of others (too many times people hear us complain about our spouse and not build them up) and written it good too, texts, notes (maybe in their car or on their desk or on the mirror, etc.)

Ex. The notes I have in my room or the letters I keep in my desk

• Actions

And finally, we let these steps come out in our actions. This is an important step and one that should not be missed. 1 John 3:18 says:

“Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.”

1 John 3:18

The actions are the place others see our commitment to relationships and the expression of our love. This is love in action.

Ex. Little gifts, opening doors, doing something without being asked or something off a honeydo list, a special treat or surprise, etc.

Now you also have on out, if you do this and someone asks why, you can just say “My pastor told me to!” J

The Big Wedding

Here is the great thing about this: These things are reflective of our relationship ith God and what he does for us. Follow me on this, God makes us a priority, we are in tis thoughts and he never forgets us or forgets about us, god tells us in his Word how much he loves us and his actions are constantly showing us how much he loves us, i.e. answers to pray and blessing in our life.

Let me put his in marriage language. God loves us and we, the church are his bride. One day he will be coming for his bride, you and I, and we will be with him forever. See this is like an engagement period. For those of you who are married remember you engagement period. It’s magical in many ways. You are excited about that wedding day, you are filled with anticipation, even when things don’t go well, love prevails and you focus on the positive. This life is like our engagement period with God. We are told in Revelation 19:7:

“Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready.” Rev. 19:7

We, the church, are the bride of the King and the great news, divorce is no more. God wants to restore our relationship with him and he will never divorce us.

Challenge: not only do these steps in our relationship with each other, do them in our relationship with God.

Flirting With Danger

Matthew 5:27-30

“It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.”

Sam The Ladies Man

I once had a friend that, for the sake of protecting the guilty, who I will call Sam. Now Sam was probably about 5’8” and an average looking guy but he had a certain way about him with the ladies. In his day he was called a playboy but n today’s world he would be call a “playa.” We at one time worked together and we were friends outside of work as well. I felt we knew each other pretty well.

Here’s the story with Sam. He had this habit of dating multiple women at the same time. Now he had this whole thing down to a tee.  Let me explain one situation that happened one time when we were friends. He had gotten tot eh point of dating 3 women at the same time. We lived n the mid-peninsula so he dated one in the mid-peninsula, one in San Francisco, and one in the San Jose area. This is how he kept it all straight and balanced. The one who lived in San Francisco he would only take on dates in San Francisco or north. The one who lived in San Jose he would only take on dates in San Jose or south. The one who lived in the mid-peninsula he would only take on dates in the mid-peninsula or east. This was supposed to keep them separate and lessened the chance that anyone would see him with the wrong woman in the wrong area.  Now he also had a plan when it came to things like birthdays or Christmas.  He would always but 3 of the same thing so he would never be confused at what he had given each woman. So, for example, if he was buying a Christmas present he would buy say 3 of the same sweater. That way there was never a chance of saying the wrong thing. Now it is important to understand that each woman thought she was exclusively dating him..

This all backfired on Sam one day. I had shown up to do something with Sam and he didn’t look so hot. When I asked him what was up, he told what happened.  The mid-peninsula woman had come over his apt. one day to surprise him, but, while she was there, the woman from San Francisco showed up to surprise him. They begin taking and find out that he is dating the two of them and they are not happy.  But (yes, it gets better), while they are talking, the phone rings and it’s the 3^rd woman and the other two pick up and they are now having a 3 way conversation about Sam and all are very angry. Sam walks in and all three break up with him. You would think it ended there and that Sam may have learned his lesson.  Would you believe, within a month, all three called him back and began dating him again all with the stipulation that he not date the other two.

So here is the thing, the Bible clearly teaches about the importance of marriage, about sex being within the marriage context, about the importance of honoring relationships, and about honesty. How we view our relationships here on earth is reflective of our relationship with God so let’s see what Jesus has to say about this topic 

Read Passage – Matthew 5:27-30

²⁷ “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ ²⁸ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. ²⁹ If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. ³⁰ And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

The 7^th and 10^th Commandments

The tendency when it comes to speaking on adultery and a passage like this, to be honest,  is to just skip it. It’s not comfortable, it almost seems inappropriate in church, and it just seems easier to just glide over it. It doesn’t seem right to talk about sex and intimate things in church and yet, God created sex as a wonderful, amazing, good thing; in the marriage relationship. For some reason we still feel a bi uncomfortable with it (You even look like you are squirming in your seat right now). As we saw last week, that in this section of the SM Jesus uses a specific formula in these six dialogues on our behavior.  The formula is:

O.T. law + the current trend or interpretation à Jesus explanation and fulfillment 

So in this section, Jesus is actually quoting two Old Testament passages from Exodus 20:

“You shall not commit adultery.” Exodus 20:14

and

Ex. 20:17 

This seems to emphasize the importance that Jesus is placing on relationships and holding those relationships sacred, especially in terms of the fidelity concept. Jesus uses two references as he confronts this topic.

Many gods

The second part of the formula is the current situation or interpretation. The current situation is that the Israelites are under Roman rule and the Romans have many gods. They had a god for everything. The Israelite religious leaders condemning their gods and their lifestyle. Here is what is happening though, the Romans do have many god and their lifestyle reflects it. It’s out there for everyone to see. Here is the kicker, the Israelite leaders had their own gods like money, power, control and authority. Their gods were inner gods in their heart and a lot less seen by others. I think there is a caution here that we need to be careful when we point out others short comings because we all have things we need to address in our lives. Now listen to Jesus words in verse 28 again:

“But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” vs. 28 

Jesus knows the religious leaders are seeing the many Roman gods and are condemning them but in some ways the religious leaders are seeing what the Romans have; the power and authority and they want that, in fact, they may even be a bit envious that the Romans have that control and they don’t. the problem lies in that the Israelites sins are in their heart and they think people can’t see that.  It seems hidden and not detectable. So Jesus addresses what is in the heart. 

The Deeper Issue: C­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­_______________

Now Jesus brings this thought home by touching on the real issue, the deeper issue, the heart issue, and that is: commitment. Jesus wants the outside to match the inside.  He wants our words to match our actions. He wants our yes to be yes and our vows to be kept. He addresses the deeper issues of the heart and how those look when it comes to our relationships; with the people in our lives and with God himself.

Two Warnings

Jesus uses two scenario’s to guide our thoughts and challenge us about our commitments. Jesus builds into this section two of the things that can keep us from keeping our commitments but also the two things that we can use to help us keep our commitments. He really wants us to consider if we are taking our commitments seriously so much so that we would be willing to loose body parts. It doesn’t seem that he literally wants us to go around poking our eyes out and cutting off our arms.  He uses this as an analogy to show how seriously God takes our words and vows. He does this by raising the bar in challenging us how far we are willing to go to challenge ourselves and discipline ourselves.

1. Guard Your Eyes

The first example comes in verse 29:

“If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” vs. 29

Why start there? It’s because the eyes are the medium through which the temptation to lust is stimulated. It starts in our mind and thoughts. Think about the things that lure us away. Most of them, maybe not all but most, comes from what we see. Our eyes see what is appealing, what is luring, what is pleasing and they draw us in.

Think how much of our life is influenced by what we see. Commercials are meant to draw us to a product. What we see is meant to attract us and build in the desire. Now in terms of adultery, this comes in many ways. It might be the physical attraction that we have to another person. Our world preys on that.

Ex. Commercials for food, etc. that use women to draw men in.

But is also comes in other ways as well.  When we see someone treating someone well, that can “catch our eye” and that be attractive. When someone performs an act of kindness that makes us look at someone differently.

Jesus uses an extreme measure here in challenging us on how we are going to implement this in our life.  Obviously if we were to take it literally, a lot of people would be walking around looking like a pirate with patches on their eye.

The challenge: To put restraints and checks in place to keep our minds and hearts pure.

Example: guards on our computer, discipline in the movies, TV, videos we watch, books we read, etc.

Warning: Be careful of those who say things like, it’s okay to check out the good just not touch.

2. Keep Your Hands In Their Space

The second example Jesus uses is the medium by which we take the action that ruins or builds our commitments.

“And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away.” vs. 30

So the eyes draw us in but the hands are representative of the acts of sin that break our commitment.

The Biblical Theme of Fidelity

But in the Bible there is a running theme of fidelity that runs through the entire book. Why? Good question.  It’s reflective of our relationship with God. From the earliest of times, God talks about our having a relationship with him and that relationship being pure.  He wants to be our God and we are to be his people. That is the basis for his relationship with Adam and Eve and it continues on throughout he generations and with the nation Israel.  Many times when humankind has broken that relationship God, he uses fidelity language to describe the break. Once when Israel had abandoned God of idols the prophet Ezekiel says to them on God’s behalf in 6:9:  

“…

This pattern continues throughout the Bible until the end times when in Revelation we are called the bride of Christ, Rev. 21:9:

“One of the seven angels who had the seven bowls full of the seven last plagues came and said to me, “Come, I will show you the bride, the wife of the Lamb.” Rev. 21:9

There is probably no more sacred relationship that we have than the marriage relationship. We take the vows seriously and when they are not upheld, the effects are usually devastating and extremely stressful and painful.

“It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.” Vs. 30

                           Relationship Makers and Breakers

Matthew 5:21-24

“First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.” vs. 24

The Results of Anger

When I was about 9 or 10 years old, there came a time when, as all siblings  do, my brothers and I got into a small squabble.  It was probably one of those really important and pressing matters, like, “you’re breathing my air” or “you walked in my path” or “you took my last rubber band  during our rubber band fights, or something really important like that. I’m sure my dad told us to stop a few times, especially when we started wrestling a bit, but of course, we didn’t hear it, we’ll we selectively didn’t hear it. So here we are arguing and wrestling in our living room and my dad, my mild mannered, dad who rarely gets mad, and even more rarely shows emotions as a whole, has had enough. The next thing we hear, and it stops us all dead in our tracks, is this huge bang and along with that my dad scream, “Will you kids stop your fighting!” So what was the bang? My dad as he is screaming, punches the door, and…he puts this bog hole in it. Yeah! My dad. We not only stopped fighting immediately, but now we are not sure what to do, cause we are scared and we wanted to laugh at the same time. My dad, my dad has never hit us, never spanked us, never hurts a fly, puts his fist through the door.

Here’s the crazy thing.  No one has ever fixed that door.  It’s like a reminder to us of that event. I started dating Claudia and when she comes home to meet my family and we walk through the house, there is the hole and I have to explain to her what happened and why its there.  I had to explain to my daughters why there is a hole in the door that used to be my brothers room. Yeah, it’s still there today.

Anger can be a good thing but it can also be pretty destructive. Understanding it can be a bit confusing too. Jesus touches on the correlation of anger and relationships in Matthew chapter 5 and that is what we are going to look at this morning.  If you are able, please stand as we read Matthew 5:21-24.

Read Passage – Matthew 5:21-24

²¹ “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ ²² But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.

²³ “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, ²⁴ leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.

The Antithesis

Matthew 5 starts with the Beatitudes which we looked at and then Jesus gave a few examples of how to live those beatitudes out. Last week Jesus set the stage for us by explaining that he came to fulfill the law and not abolish it. Jesus now launches into a new section of instructions and explanations about the Old Testament laws and how we deal with them in life.  In fact, this section can be called the antithesis section because they all start the same way; verse 21a:

“You have heard that it was said…” vs. 21a

Jesus starts each of the next six sections the same way with “You’ve heard that it was said…” and then quotes an Old Testament law. There is actually a formula that happens in these sections:

O.T. law + the current trend or interpretation à Jesus explanation and fulfillment

Jesus affirms an Old Testament law and then describes the current trend and interpretation of that law and then, this is the good part, he gives us his explanation of what that is to look like in our life. He does that by using an authoritative pronouncement in the phrase, “But I say to you…”

So in our passage today Jesus talks about the OT law “you shall not murder” found in Deut. 5:17. The current trend or interpretation during Jesus time of that law is this was to be true for the average Israelite but within the religious leaders they were not being held accountable to this.  Their theory was they were exempt from it because it was their job to uphold holiness and to keep control of the people. The real reason was to keep themselves in power so they would “do away” with anyone that threatened their power or control.  Case in point: Jesus. Jesus comes along now in our passage and gives us what that law looks like because of the work Jesus would do on the cross. We will look at that more in a minute.

What Are The Odds

Before we get to Jesus interpretation and fulfillment, don’t tune out. Verse 21 b reads:

“‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.” Vs. 21b

You might say what does this have to do with me? I am not nor will I ever be a murderer. In fact, what are the odds any of us will be a murderer? Probably somewhat slim. Many people might  even read right past this section thinking, check, I’ve got that one covered, not going to happen with me. But here is where Jesus bring new enlightenment to these words and with him, and with God for that matter, he looks at it much differently and much deeper. Because with Jesus, fulfillment of this law is more than just the action of killing another human being.; it’s about how we handle our feelings, thoughts, and actions working in cooperation with each other. In a Godly sense, we can all be a relationship killer and Jesus is all about relationship.

Relationship Makers and Breakers

The core of Jesus explanation and fulfillment comes with a focus on anger. Would you agree with me that there is good and bad anger? Sure, there is.  Good anger is the kind that comes at the injustices of the world and the desire to see our world become a better place. Good anger the4lls us there is a problem and helps us set boundaries and limitations so that people are affirmed and treated properly and so that God’s ideals and values are upheld. God displays anger, Jesus showed anger when he flipped the tables over in the temple, etc.  There are good reasons to be angry at times.  But there is also bad anger. Anger that is unproductive, destructive and leads to un-health. The ultimate bad anger is displayed in murder. Jesus challenges the religious leaders and anyone who reads this passage, us, to truly put aside the bad anger and to be people of relationship.  So we are challenged with this question:

Are you a relationship maker or breaker?

Let’s see the insight Jesus gives us on this in three different aspects.

1. Feelings and Emotions

The first aspect comes in how we deal with our feelings and emotions. Jesus says in verse 22a:

“But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.” vs. 22a

Jesus starts by touching on the surface level of anger which is our feelings and emotions. It’s our initial reaction to things and how we respond to situations.  Feelings can be right but sometimes feelings can mislead us or need to be adjusted when we discover more of the facts behind a situation. Feelings and emotions are the sensations. Good feelings are happiness, joy, peace, and contentment. Bad feelings are anger, frustration, discontent and maliciousness. Many times our feelings and emotions are that initial response to something. Solomon wrote in Ecc. 7:9:

“Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.” Ecc. 7:9

You may have experienced this during your week sometime. I did.

Ex. The senseless killings we saw in Santa Barbara. That whole situation was horrific and senseless and such a tragedy. But here is where I got angry this week.  Every time you turned on the news there was the picture of the murdered and that video tape he made the day before.  That stirred up in me some anger because I felt that played right into the murderers plan. I wasn’t angry at him per se but at the media for the way they kept showing him and the video and that lack of coverage on the victims. That whole situation should lead us to want to see some change in our world for those that are struggling with horrible psychological issues but it should also challenge us to challenge the media and challenge them to cover these tragedies the right way.

Jesus is warning us that if we let those emotions and feeling govern our lives, we are subject to judgment. Others will look at us as foolish and immature. You know, you see someone fly off the handle at some meaningless situation and you judge them that way. We can also be judged in our world today by thousands.  The interent and phone videos are exposing the crazy way people respond to situations and they can cost you your job, your marriage, or nay of a number of other things.

2. Mind and Thoughts

The second aspect Jesus touches on is the mind and thoughts when it comes to anger. Verse 22b:

“Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court.” vs. 22b

This actually jumps to the next level in us. The word “Raca” that Jesus uses here is more literally translated “empty headed.” This is more than just a thought, this is actual name calling and revealing what is in your heart. Remember Jesus said it is not what goes into a person that is bad but what comes out because it reveals who we really are inside. When we put others down with our words, like calling them empty headed, we are elevating ourselves and putting others down. Paul touches on this too in Romans 12:3:

“Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.” Rom. 12:3

This happens often. We see the actions of others and can’t believe that they are acting and reacting in certain ways.  We judge that and sometimes fall into the trap of calling them names.  Now I know this is a touchy but we probably see this in our world in driving.

Ex. My experience in the post office last week. One employee judging another employee’s actions and they get into a shouting match right in the  lobby of the post office. They start calling each other names and it gets really uncomfortable for all those in line.

Now notice what Jesus says happens when we respond with bad anger in these situations; it can lead to us having legal actions against us (libel). So the anger has worked from our feelings and emotions to our words.

3. Heart and Soul

Then, the third aspect comes when it works into our heart and soul. Jesus continues in verse 22c:

“And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.” vs. 22c

The anger has now worked its way through our entire being and is now at the core of who we are.  If you recall a statement I quoted last week from Joseph Stowell from the book Fan The Flame where he said; “The heart is the place to which God looks.”  Jesus brings this out in the term he quotes when he says, “You fool.” This is a term of contempt that was meant to strip away a person’s identity and wrongly make that person into something they are not. What we do when we take this attitude is play the role of God and we are condemning them. We are saying they are the lowest of the low. We are literally saying that they can “go to hell.”  We should never put ourselves in God’s place and in his role. We can be angry at a person’s actions, and we can be frustrated with the way they are acting or treating us but we should never supposed to play the role of God.

1. Again, not to bring up a sore subject but this is exactly what we saw this week in Santa Barbara. A young man felt he had been wronged. His anger built and built and he never dealt with all those ill feeling and thoughts and they made intot he core of who he was and lead to the terrible scene we saw played out. My heart and prayers go out to the families of those innocent people who were killed.

Bad anger lead to us ultimately condemning people instead of what God is looking for from us is to build relationships and encourage others. We are called to sincere love as we read from 1 Peter 1:22:

“Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart.” 1 Peter 1:22

Jesus warns us not to condemn and Peter tells us that God’s plan for us is sincere love. Not approval of bad behavior, not overlooking wrongs, but sincere love that recognizes that God has a plan for every person, a good plan for them that they find the abundant life in him, that they may have life abundantly.

The Escalating Demise

This section has a pattern to it. It’s escalates in us by moving from our feelings and emotions, mind and thoughts, and then to our heart and soul. It also has an escalating demise.

The demise; judged by others, to taken to court, to the danger of the fire of hell.

With each step anger takes deeper into our being, the consequences become more dire and severe. This is the danger that anger brings to us when we let it rule our life. By the way, just a fun fact, notice that the core of the word danger is anger. J

Clearing The Slate

So what are we to do.?  Jesus answers that too, verse 24:

“First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.” vs. 24

The answer challenges us to make a decision about whether we are a relationship maker or breaker. Remember the story of my dad and the door. We have never fixed that door. If you were to go to my parent’s house  you would be able to see it. That is reflective of what happens when we are relationship breaker.  We put dents and holes in people’s lives. Sometimes those dents and holes are never fixed.  They are permanent. But they don’t have to be.  We can clear the slate. It’s the process of reconciling relationships and starting over.

Communion

That leads us to communion that we are celebrating today. God calls us to clear the slate every time we come to this table.  We need to clear the slate with God.  We can’t really come clean with God if we are holding grudges and judging others and have that attitude in our heart.